Making Time for Meaningful Connections (Even When You're Swamped)
When I was the Director of Development at a mid-sized nonprofit, I wanted to make space for cultivating relationships with our supporters. I knew how important it was. But between meetings, managing staff, responding to emails, and juggling the never-ending to-do list, relationship-building often felt like an afterthought.
And yet, as fundraisers, we know that meaningful connections are among the most effective things we can do.
So why do they often fall to the bottom of the list?
Because no one is waiting for that spontaneous phone call—but the emails are waiting for a reply. The table assignments for the gala feel urgent. That internal meeting? It’s on the calendar. But writing thank-you notes or checking in with a long-time donor? Those don’t usually come with a deadline.
Relationship-building often feels like something we can do “once we get through the list.” But here’s the truth: we rarely get through the list. I can’t count the number of times I started the day with a tidy, prioritized task list… only to end the day with even more on it.
So, how do we break the cycle?
Step one is recognizing that relationship-building isn’t extra—it’s essential.
It’s not just about shifting your mindset. It’s about giving this work the structure and value we assign to everything else.
Try this:
Set a clear, measurable goal for donor engagement—maybe it’s five personal interactions a week, or 15 per month. Whatever number makes the most sense for your objectives.
Use your CRM, a spreadsheet, or a post-it on your desk—whatever works—to track these touchpoints.
Then, make the process personal.
Not everyone likes picking up the phone—and that’s okay. If hand-written notes are your thing, do that. Maybe you shine in coffee conversations, or enjoy crafting thoughtful emails filled with good news about your organization’s impact. Play to your strengths. The best system is the one you’ll actually use.
A few ideas to make it easier:
Use your CRM or a tool like Asana or Trello to schedule outreach.
Pull a donation report from a specific time frame and use it as your weekly call list.
When a gift comes in, set a calendar reminder to check in with the donor in a specific time frame - whether it is one month later or six months later. Just something so it doesn’t fall off the radar.
Try a moves management system to automate reminders for key touchpoints.
Remember the “rocks in the jar” analogy?
If you haven’t heard it: imagine filling a jar with big rocks (your most important priorities), then adding pebbles and sand (smaller tasks and interruptions). If you start with sand, there’s no room for rocks. But if you start with rocks, the rest often fits.
Relationship-building is a big rock. Start with it.
And I’ll leave you with a memory that’s stayed with me for more than 25 years:
Years ago, I told a friend I wanted to learn guitar, but “just couldn’t find the time.” She looked at me and said, “You’ll never find the time. You have to make the time.”
That stuck with me. And every time I say, “I just can’t find the time for…” I hear her voice.
So today, I’m encouraging you:
Don’t wait until you have time—make the time to connect with your supporters. It’s one of the most powerful investments you can make in your organization’s future.
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